Alice Cooper/Welcome 2 My Nightmare/2011

Making a sequel to just about anything — just seems like a bad idea. Did the world really need “Police Academy 2”? Did “Jaws 2” improve upon the masterpiece that was the original? Sure, “The Empire Strikes Back” and “Terminator 2: Judgment Day” actually surpass their predecessors in every way imaginable, but they are the exception, not the rule. For every “The Dark Knight”, there is a “Teen Wolf Too” — a blatant attempt by the studio to cash in on the name and success of the original with nothing new to offer.

Which brings us to Alice Cooper's, “Welcome 2 My Nightmare”, his sequel to 1975's, “Welcome to My Nightmare”, his stunning solo debut. Full disclosure here; “Welcome to My Nightmare” is one of my all time favorite records. So obviously any album by Alice Cooper essentially bearing the same name, is going to be fighting an uphill battle with me. Alice has said in interviews while promoting the album that it's not really a sequel, but instead is a new nightmare. Maybe I'm a sucker for marketing manipulation, but that clever little bit of spin does help me accept the possibility of a Nightmare sequel — somewhat.

Alice assembled an all star line-up for this effort. Vince Gill, Ke$ha, Kip Winger, Rob Zombie, and John 5 all make appearances. Of course longtime producer, song-writer, and fifth Beatle in the Alice Cooper universe, Bob Ezrin, makes his mandatory contributions. In addition, Alice also brought back several members of the original — and best — Alice Cooper Band. This caught my interest immediately. I love the original Alice Cooper Band line-up.

“Welcome 2 My Nightmare” sounds amazing. The production is modern and glossy. The musicianship is top notch. It has to be. This album covers a lot of musical ground. The record effortlessly shifts from garage rock to country, disco to pop, and everything in-between. Alice, himself, sounds fantastic. His voice isn't showing any signs of age.

Of course, the quality of ones voice is a moot point when, on track one, it is auto-tuned a la Lil' Wayne, for the entirety of the song. It actually works for the most part, although I'm sure many hard rockin' purists will reject this track on principle alone. “I Am Made of You” triumphantly emerges as the best, albeit unlikely, track on the album. Opening with a piano passage lifted directly from the original “Welcome to My Nightmare”, “I Am Made of You”, is a stirring pseudo-ballad — an epic number that sounds more like an album closer than an opener.

The second track, “Caffeine” sounds much more like what one might expect when tossing an Alice Cooper record on the old turntable. “Caffeine” is reminiscent of classic seventies era Alice Cooper. Which is good because I prefer that over hair-metal Alice Cooper of the eighties.

It should be noted before going any further, that once again, Alice is telling the story of a character (who may or may not be Steven from “Welcome to My Nightmare”), who is suffering from a series of terrifying nightmares (thus the need for “Caffeine”), pushing the boundaries of sanity and thrusting him toward a dark and sometimes corny, descent into hell.

The songs are, for at least the first half of the record, surprisingly strong. “A Runaway Train” rocks with a little country twang courtesy of Vince Gill. His solo shreds. “Last Man on Earth”, echoes the original Nightmare album's, schmaltzy track, “Some Folks.” “The Congregation” reminds me of a modern twist on 1972's “Elected.” “I'll Bite Your Face Off” borrows heavily from the Rolling Stones, but works really well. “Welcome 2 My Nightmare” loses a little steam with the straight disco cheese that is “Disco Bloodbath Boogie Fever.” John 5 turns in an excellent solo at the tail end of the tune, but even his blast of virtuosity isn't enough to save this ill-advised dance track. The album continues to sputter with “Ghouls Gone Wild” — a fifties style beach rocker that just isn't as fun as it should be. “Something To Remember Me By” is a surprisingly beautiful ballad that really showcases Alice's remarkable vocal ability. “When Hell Comes Home” follows and finally restores the promise of the albums earlier tracks. “What Baby Wants” is pop rock duet with Ke$ha. I'm absolutely positive that 100 percent of the metal head community will hate this. I don't really care for it either. It's not horrible, it just sounds more like a Ke$ha track than an Alice Cooper track. “I Gotta Get Outta Here” can be best described as an upbeat version of 1971's “The Ballad of Dwight Frye.”

The album closes with “The Underture”, an instrumental medley of both the original “Welcome to My Nightmare” and its sequel. It's actually a well crafted piece of music and fans of the original Nightmare will certainly enjoy it. Unfortunately for me, every time “Welcome 2 My Nightmare” quotes a passage of music from “Welcome to My Nightmare”, whether it's in “The Underture” medley, the piano in “I Am Made of You”, or the shouts of “Steven” in “When Hell Comes Home”, I am reminded of an infinitely better record and mentally removed from enjoying “Welcome 2 My Nightmare” for what it is. I know this isn't fair to Alice's second Nightmare, but honestly, I was having a hard time welcoming this nightmare with open arms anyway. 6/10